"You are a child of God. You are brave and strong and proud enough to receive God's gifts with all of your soul."

Larissa Kaye Batten (LLbeara@aol.com) writes "Soul Food," a weekly column for SpiritSite.com.  

Larissa is a prolific writer whose work has been featured in several publications.

"Am I insane for doing this?" my husband asked me a few nights before his dream journey to Nepal.

Hmmm. Three weeks trekking in the Himalayas, 10 days staying in a Buddhist monastery, 25 hours of flying just to get there, thousands of dollars for the trip, lots of money for the equipment, clothes squeezed into ziplock bags to keep out water, a sleeping bag barely wide enough for a Labrador Retriever, rubber slippers, filtered water, old coffee-colored pants that zip off into equally ugly shorts (don't tell him I said that!), underwear with air holes to help with sweat, shots up the wazoo to bar against disease, and a virtual guarantee of diarrhea - if not dysentary.

"Honey, will you ask that question again please?" 

"Am I insane for doing this?" my husband asked.

Of course you are, you loon, I thought. You crazy, batty, wildly foolish husband of mine whom I adore with all of my heart.

"Are you insane for doing what?" I asked, feigning ignorance.  My husband knows me too well to buy my innocence.

Of course you're crazy, I should tell him. Who would voluntarily fly 25 hours anywhere, dream or no dream? Who would even consider the possibility of dysentery, not to mention having to stoop somewhere in the Himalayas to take care of the results of it?

What should I tell him?

I guess I should cheerfully tell him, "Honey, this is your dream you're talking about. You've been wanting to do this for so long, and you love to travel. You've been studying Buddhism -- now you have the chance to stay with monks in a monastery. Imagine, what a dream this is!"

But I don't tell him this, not exactly.

For me, this journey would be insane.  You couldn't pay me a million dollars to sit on a plane for 25 hours. I have no interest at this point in time in hiking the Himalayas. I would take a Howard Johnson's any day over a stay in an itty bitty sleeping bag.

So what I am I supposed to tell him? I should be honest. I should be sincere. I should tell him how much I love and support him, insanity and all.

But therein lies the question. Is he really insane?

Is my husband crazy because he has a dream that is vastly different than my own?

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! My ego would shout "yes" from the top of the Himalayas if ever I were to travel there.

Yet the answer is no. My husband is not insane, and I know it. 

He swore he would eat really well for the month before his trip. He has eaten well this past month; he will swear to it. He has feasted on Coke, chocolate syrup on vanilla ice cream, cookies, pizza, yada yada yada. Who am I to call this behavior insane? His reasoning is sound. He loves these foods. He will get in shape in the Himalayas. Why not enjoy himself now. Maybe I would do things differently, but then again I'm not my husband.

My husband leaves for his dream journey tomorrow. He is on the telephone right now saying goodbye to his mother. Surely she knows how sane her son is.

In the meantime, I still have yet to answer his question. I'd like to take this opportunity to practice my answer.

"Honey, you're crazy. Period. Time for the psych ward."

No, seriously.

"My dear, I love you. I support you. God has given me an amazing gift in you. We have both been given an amazing gift: the most precious gift is our faith in Him.

"To me, my darling Danny, a dream is God-given. A dream is God telling us that all of His gifts are real. A dream is God saying that we can reach as far and wide as we possibly can and still not be near the infinite gifts and power of God's love.

"Travel, my loving husband. Be safe on your journey. I love you too much to keep you from your dreams, no matter how much I will miss you. 

"You are not insane, my love. You are a child of God. You are brave and strong and proud enough to receive God's gifts with all of your soul.  Travel now on this journey and know through every step and breath and mile of journey, God is with you.

"You inspire me, my husband. You have answered the call of your soul, and you inspire me to become one with my own. Together, then, soul by soul, spirit by spirit, let us travel together with the sweet love of God.  And so it is."

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