"I have almost always been one to follow my intuition, often to the dismay and surprise of my fellows."

Larissa Kaye Batten (LLbeara@aol.com) writes "Soul Food," a weekly column for SpiritSite.com.  

Larissa is a prolific writer whose work has been featured in several publications.

"I will do anything for any price," I penned across the top of my crisp, white resume.

"You've got to be kidding," my conscience should have interjected.

I was standing in front of the receptionist for the Time-Life building in London, England.  I had just graduated from college.

"Do anything for any price?" my conscience should have said. "You're acting like a prostitute -- in London, England, to top it all off."

I suppose my conscience didn't like confrontation at the time, for it never said a word. Not a single word.

I simply handed my resume to the snooty English woman who had just told me she could not help me in any way whatsoever. Period. Goodbye.

"Thank you," I managed to say before I stepped back out onto the streets of big, old London.

I should mention that I had no intention whatsoever of dropping my resume off at Time-Life. I have such a miserable sense of direction, however, that I managed to pass by the swanky building twice in the same hour in search of a local employment office.

I had a six-month work visa, and I had envisioned a simple, low-paying job at some English pub. Who else would hire me?

"This is James Sullivan ringing," a voice said on my answer-phone, the fancy English word for answering machine. "I'm with Time magazine, and I'd like you to ring me regarding a job."

I returned the call.

"We would like for you to come in to interview for a position with Time magazine," he said.

Time magazine? Yeah, right. Alright, whatever.

If it really was the one and only Time magazine, I would probably be serving tea to the receptionist. Me and my sense of direction. Me and my big mouth.

To my great surprise, within weeks of my arrival in London, I was hired to be the equivalent of a copy editor for Redwood Publishing to work exclusively on the special sections for the international edition of Time.

I would be the one and only person responsible for Americanizing and copy editing the text in these special advertising sections. The results of my work would be displayed throughout the world.

Yes, I would do anything for any price. I was hired at a full-time salary with a higher salary than I could have dreamed of. I could pick my own hours, do my own work, and I would edit the work of a journalist who wrote for some of the biggest newspapers in one of the most influential cities in the world.

And why? An American staff member at Time was so distraught one day over not being able to find a fellow American to edit this section of the magazine that he was griping about it as he walked through a secretary's office. She heard his comments, and handed him my resume. So I was hired for my first post-college job to do contract work with the prestigious Time magazine.

Times have changed, of course, and now I sit behind my laptop computer in the guest room of my wooded cottage in Bluffton, South Carolina, good old USA.

I have held many jobs since, and some might say my physical sense of direction is worse than ever.

I, however, would beg to differ. I can go to the same shopping mall for a decade, and I still will not remember which department store lies at which end of the mall. I can barely give directions to my own home, and I get lost going to places I know well when I am stressed out.

If my sense of direction is judged on these points, I am a complete failure. But if my sense of direction is given the merit I believe it deserves, I surely deserve a few gold stars.
I have almost always been one to follow my intuition, often to the dismay and surprise of my fellows. I rarely take a path chosen by all others because it is chosen by all others.

If I get lost, I try to trust that I am supposed to be lost. When I find my bearings once again, I trust I have arrived where I am supposed to be.

I quit my last long-term, well-paying job at a daily, national newspaper because my intuition told me I needed to move on. I did not have another job, and I had no idea where I would go next. Little did I know I would embark on an amazing journey of the soul, and that I literally would be willing to do anything for any price.

I would learn and grow and learn and grow for any price I would have to pay. I gave up my big salary and great benefits for the only real benefit that has been of any true value for me -- the benefit of living a soulful life.

Yes, I am grateful for health benefits and for every single gift I have been given in the area of food, shelter, clothing, and anything else material that has helped me along my path.
But nothing compares with this journey of my soul.

If someone were to draw me a map of the rest of my life, I would toss it aside.

"I don't need directions, thank you very much," I would pronounce. "God takes great care of me all along the way."
I cannot tell east from west, or north from south.

But do you know something?

I have the best compass ever.

I leave my directions up to God.

"Please take me wherever you want me," I tell God.

Then I fasten my seatbelt, and off we go!

back to "Soul Food" index ->