"I had developed something that is perhaps even greater than a tangible concept of God.  I had begun to learn how to share my eyes with God."

Larissa Kaye Batten (llbeara@aol.com) writes "Soul Food," a weekly column for SpiritSite.com.  

Larissa is a prolific writer whose work has been featured in several publications.  

You can visit Lara's web site at www.miracleanimalrescue.com (site will open in a new window).

My husband Dan calls me the "Cup Lady" because I leave my empty cups around the house instead of depositing them in the sink or dishwasher.  My mother used to sigh – with a laugh – when I put my cup in the sink after she had loaded the dishwasher.

But years before I became "The Cup Lady," the first ever authentic Cup Lady cameth.

Mrs. Shelden, a resident at the Powhatan Nursing Home in northern Virginia, wore the Cup Lady crown with all her grace and glory.

I had never met a lady like Mrs. Shelden before I started my job at the nursing home, and I highly doubt I will meet anyone exactly like her again.

Mrs. Shelden, with her tight brown curls and sweet old lady dresses, sat on a chair at the nursing home as if she was on a bench waiting for the next bus.

She would arch her ancient body back, cock her head back even further, turn rigidly to the right, turn rigidly to the left, and then belt out in her drawl, "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii honey" when she saw the first person coming.

Mrs. Shelden did this all day long, and I am quite sure she was always waiting for the next person to come her way so she could dole out her favorite way of saying hello.

Mrs. Shelden wasn’t concerned with who it was that came her way. I could walk by her 10 times in an hour, and I would receive the same "Hiiiiiiiiii honey" every single time.

She would cock her body and head back, look both ways, and send forth her "Hiiiiiiiiiii honey" that made me feel so welcome in her nursing home microcosm of the whole wide world.

There was one thing I never failed to notice when I passed her by, and that was Mrs. Shelden’s cups.

Mrs. Shelden, who apparently was one of the first female attorneys in the area where she had practiced, had taken on a brand new vocation.  Mrs. Shelden collected cups like they were going out of style.

Mrs. Shelden cut slits in the sleeves of her old lady dresses and stuffed styrofoam cups up these sleeves of hers.

For anyone who might have doubted Mrs. Shelden’s sanity in her glory years, they would need to know the whole story before making a determination.  I learned the whole story by helping out during "coffee hour" at the nursing home.

See, Mrs. Shelden loved her sugar. She would drink her coffee, treat herself to a little sugar from the bottom of the styrofoam cup, and then save the rest of the sugar for later.

Not only did she save her one cup from coffee hour, but she saved cups and cups and more cups in the top drawer of her dresser.

Maybe the average person would doubt her intelligence, but the average person might not know what it’s like to spend your days in a nursing home.

Mrs. Shelden had no control over when her meals were served, what they tasted like, and what she would receive on her thick plastic tray.

Mrs. Shelden did not have candy bar machines, soda machines, restaurants, and cafes to visit. She did not go on picnics, drive to the Chinese restaurant to pick up her take-out food, or order a pizza delivery.

Mrs. Shelden had one simple treat that she could have whenever she wanted – a styrofoam cup with a bit of sugar at the bottom.

I don’t recall ever having a formal conversation with Mrs. Shelden. I certainly said hello every time I passed her as she sat on her chair waiting for the "bus" to come.  And I always looked forward to her marvelous and original, "Hiiiiiiiiiiii honey."

Somehow, even though I worked at the nursing home long before I embarked on my spiritual journey, I sensed something very special about Mrs. Shelden.

Although I had not yet accepted any concept of God in my life, and although I did not consider any faith at the time, I had developed something that is perhaps even greater than a tangible concept of God.  

I had begun to learn how to share my eyes with God.

When I watched the Cup Lady collect her cups and sugar, God was looking through my eyes.

I saw her with love. I saw the grace in her. I saw her as a perfect human being who was not insane or foolish or crabby or weird or anything at all.

I saw her as love, as laughter, as light.

I saw the Cup Lady as the Cup Lady was.

I did not judge her for cutting slits in the sleeves of her dresses and stuffing cups up them to save in her collection.

I did not gossip about her, criticize her, or avoid her because she did something that was unique to the ways I knew.

I simply loved her.

I would go home after work and call my friends. "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii honey," I would say to them.

What a beautiful gift. I was witness to a woman who was coming home to her own soul – not because she was becoming simple and strange, but because she had released to the universe all of society’s requirements to be a fine lady.

Mrs. Shelden, well, she was Mrs. Shelden.

She did not concern herself with what I or anyone else thought of her.

She wanted a little sugar in her day, and why shouldn’t she have it?

Imagine a human being who lives her life so simply, who sits on a chair with her sugar and cups, and takes the time to say "Hiiiiiiiii honey" to whoever passes by.

I spent a good number of years after I left my job at Powhatan Nursing Home complicating my life.

A little sugar was not enough for me. Taking the time to say "Hiiiiiiiii honey" to my fellow human beings was not even a consideration. I was too busy seeking my own successes, and achieving my own failures.

I needed to fail before I learned to succeed.

I had given God my eyes for the short period of time I knew Mrs. Shelden, but then I took them back.

I no longer allowed God’s grace to shine through what I knew and saw.

I looked through my eyes of ego and saw a world I didn’t like.

I didn’t take the time to sit in a chair and say hello to everyone who passed by.

I didn’t want a little taste of sugar to brighten my day.

I wanted it all. I wanted life the way I thought life was supposed to be.

I guess I have come full circle now.

I have a simple life today, and I pray that I will have the courage to simplify it even more.

Once again, I feel God’s eyes shining through mine.

I see the joy and love and grace in simple people doing simple things.

And when I remember the Cup Lady, I remember this.

I still have a long way to go before I have the humility to be exactly and fully who I am, before I accept who and what I am, before I fully understand that the most important things in life are a little bit of sugar in a styrofoam cup and a happy hello to my fellows.

May I continue to walk down the path of simplicity, and may I always take the time to say hello.

May I let God’s grace shine through my eyes that I might see the beauty in the simple, that I might know the love in humility, that I might carry on the only truth that really matters.

The next time God offers me a styrofoam cup with a little bit of sugar in it, I hope I remember to thank him for the gifts he gives me.

Only God truly knows the grace in the simple, and may I be thankful for the simple sugar God leaves for me in my cup.

Amen.

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