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Excerpted from Anatomy of the Spirit by Caroline Myss. Copyright © 1996 by Caroline Myss. Excerpted by permission of Harmony Books, a division of Random House, Inc.  All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.  HTML and web pages copyright © by SpiritSite.com.

"I felt as if I were suddenly responsible for explaining the will of God to dozens of sad, frightened people, without any training."

Caroline Myss, Anatomy of the Spirit, Part 2

I got through the first six months only by telling myself that using my medical intuition was a bit of a game. I got excited when I made an accurate "hit" because, if nothing else, an accurate hit meant my sanity was intact. Even so, each time I wondered: 'Will 'it' work this time? What if no impressions show up? What if I'm wrong about something? What if someone asks me something I can't answer? What if I tell someone she's healthy, only to learn later that she's had a terminal diagnosis? And above all, whatís a journalist-theological-student-turned-publisher doing in this borderline occupation in the first place?"

I felt as if I were suddenly responsible for explaining the will of God to dozens of sad, frightened people, without any training. Ironically, the more these folks wanted insight into what God was doing to them, the more I wanted insight into what God was doing to me. The pressure I felt finally resulted in years of migraine headaches.

I wanted to carry on as if my emerging skill were no different from a talent for baking, but I knew better. Having grown up Catholic and studied theology, was keenly aware that transpersonal abilities lead one inevitably to the monastery--or to the madhouse. Deep in my soul, I knew that I was connecting with something that was essentially sacred, and that knowledge was splitting me in two. On the one hand, I feared that I would become incapacitated, like mystics of old; on the other, I felt destined for a life in which I would be evaluated and judged by believers and skeptics. No matter how I envisioned my future, however, I felt I was headed for misery.

But I was fascinated by my newfound perceptual ability, nonetheless, and was compelled to keep on evaluating people's health. In these early days the impressions I received were mainly of a person's immediate physical health and the related emotional or psychological stress. But I could also see the energy surrounding that person's body. I saw it filled with information about that personís history. And I saw that energy as an extension of that person's spirit I began to realize something I had never been taught in school: that our spirit is very much a part of our daily lives; it embodies our thoughts and emotions, and it records every one of them, from the most mundane to the visionary.

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