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Excerpted from The Conscious Heart by Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph.D. and Gay Hendricks, Ph.D. Copyright 1997 by Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph.D. and Gay Hendricks, Ph.D. Excerpted by permission of Bantam Books, a division of Random House, Inc.  All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.  HTML and web pages copyright by SpiritSite.com.
 


"As you step into these soul- commitments, you may find, as we did, that you have stepped off the shore and into a vast ocean of possibilities and currents."

Kathlyn Hendricks and Gay Hendricks, 
The Conscious Heart, Part 2

The Seven Soul-Commitments

As our relationship grew in depth and understanding, we found that there were seven major process commitments that really made a difference. We took years to develop, understand, and embrace these commitments in our souls. Once we did, however, the heart-level satisfaction of our relationship became much more profound. Here are the commitments that we discovered to be essential:

The First Soul-Commitment

I commit to realizing my full potential for both closeness and autonomy. I open myself to learning about and honoring my essence-rhythms of closeness and separateness, and to learning about and honoring those rhythms in others.

The Second Soul-Commitment

I commit to full expression, to holding back nothing. This means telling the truth about everything, including my feelings, my fantasies, and my actions. I commit to telling the unarguable truth--truth that no one can argue with--instead of giving my opinions, beliefs, and prejudices. I also commit to listening, nonjudgmentally, to what people say to me.

The Third Soul-Commitment

I commit to becoming the source of full responsibility for my life, including my happiness, my well-being, and my life-goals. I absolve everyone, living or dead, past or present, from any implication that they cause my feelings or actions in any way.

The Fourth Soul-Commitment

When faced with the choice between being happy and being defensive, I commit to choosing happiness. I commit to doing this especially in those situations when my defensiveness seems most warranted and when it is totally obvious to me that I am right and the other person is wrong.

The Fifth Soul-Commitment

I commit to learning to love and appreciate myself and others in my close relationships.

The Sixth Soul-Commitment

I commit to the full expression of my creativity, and to inspiring the full creative expression of those around me.

The Seventh Soul-Commitment

I commit to celebration as the dominant emotional tone of my relationships. Particularly, I commit to celebrating the essence of myself and those close to me.

As you step into these soul-commitments, you may find, as we did, that you have stepped off the shore and into a vast ocean of possibilities and currents. As we learned to appreciate the daily challenges of riding the waves of discovery, we sometimes tumbled and rolled with an unexpected swell.

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